Fear and Compassion
by Eternal Night Owl
Summary: When Latvia has a panic attack in the middle of the night, Poland offers his support and understanding. Sometimes that's enough.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia**

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Nights were never easy for Latvia.

Even as a child, the darkness of night would fill his head with what ifs that turned his dreams to nightmares. When this happened he would crawl into Estonia's bed, who acquiesced as long as he stayed promised to stay quiet. And when he couldn't, he'd wake up Lithuania who took him into his arms and let him cry until he fell asleep. Even during the time he lived with Russia and his anxiety increased by tenfold, he always had his brothers right there with him to provide soothing words and warm hugs. But now that he was an independent nation, he lived all alone in his tiny house that seemed as big and empty as a mansion.

Not all nights were bad, but this one was. He knew he was in trouble when his hands started shaking and he couldn't make them stop, when he could hear his own heart beating and the room began to spin…

 _Oh God no, please no. Not again. Please, I can't do this!_

He didn't remember what caused it this time exactly, but he did recall noticing how the shadows of tree branches in his room looked an awful lot like arms, and wouldn't it be horrible if he froze and wasn't able to defend himself in case an intruder came in…

That's when the shaking began.

Forcing himself to relax, he concentrated on his heart rate. Yes, if he slowed it down, everything would be fine. If he stayed calm and level headed, he'd be able to get to safety and not be killed or kidnapped or…

As if his own body was betraying him, his heart went into overdrive, and he felt the weight of the world slam into his chest.

After gathering what little courage he possessed, he got up from his bed and tiptoed toward his window. Trembling, he took a quick peek outside to see if there was anyone out there. He saw no one, but that didn't stop him from looking at his own trembling hands, and feeling like they didn't belong to him.

No longer able to keep his emotions under control, he reached for his phone and called Lithuania, only to have it go unanswered.

He burst into tears. _Of course he doesn't want to talk to you! You're just being a big baby and nothing bad has even happened-_

He took a shaky breath. _Calm down. You need to calm down._

Barely holding himself together, he reached out for his phone once again, this time to call Poland. If anyone knew where Lithuania was, it would be him.

Latvia stood up and paced back and forth as he waited for the Polish man to pick up his phone.

"Latvia?" he asked, tiredly. "Like, what do you want? It's five in the morning."

"I-It is?" So that's why Lithuania didn't answer his call, he was probably still asleep.

"Uh, yeah," answered Poland, confused. "Do you need something in particular or what? I'm trying to sleep here."

"D-Do you know if Li-Lithuania is there?" he asked. Poland let out an annoyed sigh.

"He's on a business trip in Vilnius. I totally offered to go, but Liet thought it would be best if I 'stayed put and didn't get into trouble,'" he answered in a poor imitation of Lithuania's accent, which under normal circumstances would have made Latvia laugh. But not tonight.

"He should know to trust me. I've gotten, like, way more responsible over the years…"

Latvia only half listened to Poland's rant, too caught up in his own thoughts. _Oh God, he's not there. His phone is off and now I have no one to talk to because Estonia would kill me if I called him this late and-_

He let a whimper escape from his throat.

"Latvia?" asked Poland in surprise. "What happened?"

"I-I-I'm fine, I just- hit my toe really hard." Latvia lied quickly.

Poland was unconvinced. "I'm sure you could try to call Liet later today if you need to talk to him. And if it's that important I might be able to help. I mean, Liet and I are practically married so that makes me, like, your brother-in-law or something..."

"..."

"Latvia?"

And just like that, the sobs slammed into him like a title wave.

"Latvia! What's wrong? Are you hurt? Did someone hurt you?" the Polish man asked, with an odd (protective?) edge in his tone.

"I-I just-I can't sleep a-and it's hard to breathe-"

"Hey, calm down, you don't have to talk if you don't want. Liet gets like this sometimes too." He paused. "What would you like me to do? Your brother likes it when I stroke his hair and rub his back. But it's hard to do that over the phone," he let out an awkward laugh.

"C-Can you distract me?" Latvia sniffed. "I really don't want to think about this right now…"

"Okay, I can do that!" Poland exclaimed, happy to help. "What do you want me to talk about?"

"Anything, anything but this."

"Well," Poland started, racking his brain. "After Liet left me here all alone like the total jerk he is, I went shopping with Italy and we got some totally fabulous new shoes. And then the other day when I went out with Hungary we saw this horror movie where an axe murderer sneaks into this family's house and it was really gory and stuff but I wasn't even scared-"

Latvia's tears came though the other line.

"Hey, are you all right? Are you sure this is working?"

"... Poland?" he asked in a small voice.

"Yes?"

"Do… Do you think I'm weak?"

"What, no! Who said that, was it Russia? I'll totally kick his ass-"

"No one said anything!" Latvia responded quickly, before Poland tried to start a war. "I just… I get so anxious for no reason and I don't know why…"

He heard Poland let out a long sigh.

"Look, we all have our problems, and we've all seen some terrible shit. It would be hard not to panic now and then after everything.

"I told you that Liet gets panic attacks sometimes, and… well so do I. He's told me about some of the things that happened to you. If you were weak Latvia, you wouldn't be here anymore."

Shocked by Poland's sincerity, he was speechless for a moment. Poland was hardly ever serious. But despite that, his words made him stand a little taller. He was still trembling, but no longer felt like the world was about to end.

"Thanks, Poland. I think I'm starting to feel a little better."

"That's great!" Poland exclaimed. "Hey, if you'd be interested… you could stay with me until Liet gets back."

"A-Are you sure?" Latvia asked in surprise. "I wouldn't want to intrude…"

"Yeah, totally! I could use the company anyway. It gets kinda boring all alone in this house, y'know?"

"Okay, thank you!" Latvia exclaimed, relieved to have an excuse to not be alone.

"Hey Poland, would it be okay if we talked for a bit longer? I don't think I'm ready to go to bed yet," he asked shyly.

"As long as you need," Poland answered. "I'll be here."

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 **Panic attacks are awful, awful things. I believe anxiety is something that all three Baltics and Poland suffer from, to varying degrees, but Latvia especially gets it pretty bad. Poor guy could probably use some therapy/medication, bu he's too afraid to go to anyone else other than family.**


End file.
